Turns out I am “The Darkness”. But, I’m so pale…?

I was over to a friends house today. His therapist has made him start a workout notebook and I asked if I could read it. He said yes. She had made him write over and over:

I am not now, have never been, and will never be happy with my body until I am not overweight.

It covered pages and pages. It is just so sad. I find it sick. What if he’s not successful, what if he only loses weight to a certain point. Does anybody else fear that she is setting him up for an eating disorder?

I next found several passages where she had told him to beware of me and the darkness that I bring (presumably because I am not trying to lose weight) and reminding him that he needs to “Carry the Light” for both of us.

If he wants to lose weight, I think that’s great. I am more than happy to support him. I recognize that not everyone is happy with their body at its current weight, I recognize that some people will see health benefits from losing weight. I do not think it’s ok to “train” someone to believe that they will get sick if they eat badly and to teach them to view people who do not want to lose weight as “darkness”.

I can’t process this right now, it’s just so…Yuck.

Published in: on November 25, 2005 at 5:09 pm  Comments (1)  

Is it too late to scratch and go home?

What a horrific weekend!

My first ballet recital was when I was 5 and I think I danced better that day than I did on Saturday. Both my pro and I had an extremely bad day. Eight beats into the first dance he forgot the routine and we did basics for the next 32 counts. It did not improve from there. We dance 7 dances and when we walked off the floor after the sixth dance (when I knocked his hat off and we both looked at is for six beats like it was a bomb) we just looked at each other and exploded into giggles and were barely able to get through the seventh dance.

It was really strange not having