Very Special Guest Blogger – Daisy!

This is Daisy, and this is what Daisy did when I walked away from my computer for a minute.

Daisy belongs to my friends Mel and Brian. A few weeks ago Mel and Brian got new neighbors.  The new neighbors meant new dogs for Daisy to meet.

One of the dogs didn’t like Daisy very much.  She would run up to the  fence and bark viciously.  Daisy is an awesome dog but is not, in any way, the brightest bulb in the box.  She didn’t understand that the dog didn’t like her.  So the interaction was basically like this:

Jasmine:  I DON’T LIKE YOU AT ALL  :( !!!!!!

Daisy:  I LIKE TO BARK AT THE FENCE  :) !!!!!

Jasmine:  I MEAN I REALLY, REALLY DON’T LIKE YOU AT ALL :( !!!!

Daisy:  OH COOL, WE’RE GONNA BARK LOUDER NOW  :) !!!!!!!

Jasmine:  I WANT TO BITE YOUR FACE OFF  :(  !!!!

Daisy:  AWESOME, WE’RE GOING TO JUMP AT THE FENCE NOW :) !!!!!

I can always have a good conversation with someone who is willing to talk, even if they don’ t agree with me.  But I’ve always struggled at how to deal with someone who just wants to call me names.  I think I’m going to take Daisy’s tactic and just act like I don’t understand what’s going on.  I’m imagining something like:

Person:  You fat bitch!

Me:  I like flowers.

Person:  I’m mean you are a big fat fatty!

Me:  Flowers are pretty.

I wonder what will happen?

In the meantime, Daisy took over my blog to give you a message about body positivity:

Hi, my name is Daisy and I have something important to say (obviously because if you think typing without opposable thumbs is easy then you have another thought coming).   There are some things you have to know about me.

  • I’m not super bright, almost everything confuses me
  • I destroy my toys, then I’m sad that I don’t have them.  But I can’t make the connection between destroying my toys and not having any so I do it every time.
  • I don’t have brakes – often the way I can come up with to stop is running full speed into something more sturdy than I am
  • I don’t meet the “Breed Standards” for American Staffordshire Terriers – I don’t look right at all
  • When I run around my face and body turn pink – it looks kind of silly.
  • My dads say that I’m made of rubber bands and poo and not much else

I’m not the perfect dog, but my dads and their friends love me and that’s all that’s important.  I think I’m awesome and that everybody wants to be my friend.  If they don’t that’s their loss.  You should think about thinking that way too.

Published in: on September 6, 2010 at 11:49 pm  Comments (9)  

9 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. LOL. I love this! Awesome, awesome POV of a dog. That’s right, all THOSE animals don’t care if they’re fat or ugly, they just live life as awesomely as possible! You never see a dog try to lose weight, call themselves fat, or be down about their appearance. Jeez. There’s a lot we can learn from animals, I think.

    • Glad that you like it, and I agree with the learning from animals thing. Imagine if your dog was like- sorry I can’t go for a walk today, my fur is just too messed up to leave the house!

  2. This was so cute! I love Staffies/Pitt varieties and all their cute cluelessness. And the I like flowers comment was classic. Gonna have to try it out!

    • I am with you. Staffies and Pits are two of my favorite breeds. Daisy definitely falls into the “Class Clown” breed characteristic. Good luck with the flower comment, let me know how it goes :)

  3. *scritches Daisy ears*

    Hiya Ragen!

    I really like the complete non-sequitor approach to dealing with douchehats. I think I will try that our for a week.

  4. Hi there Casey! I’m sure that Daisy greatly appreciates your scritches. Let me know how project non-sequitor goes… Also, I like douchehats – I’ve not used it before but it’s a nice combination of Douche and asshat, two of my favorites.

  5. I am so going to adopt the Daisy method of dealing with haters!

  6. My foster kitten does the same thing with my older cat.

    Kitten: I am going to sniff you now!
    Cat: NO! I HATE YOU! GO AWAY!
    Kitten: You are my best friend!
    Cat: GAHHH! *slaps kitten in face*
    Kitten: *completely unfazed* Yep, I am going to stay right next to you forever.
    Cat: AAARGH! *runs away*

    • So cute!


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