In case you missed it today, a fantastic video has been making the rounds of the internet. A television news woman who received a bullying e-mail from a viewer stood up to the bully on air – the video is at the end of this post.
I get hate mail every day – so much that I created a separate page for it (trigger warning – it’s my hatemail and my hopefully witty responses to it) Let’s be super clear: this isn’t about our health, their tax dollars or any type of altruism or social improvement attempt. Anybody who says it is, is just trying to justify reprehensible behavior. It’s purely about people enjoying being mean, people being bullies. They want hate us, and try to get us to hate ourselves. What is wrong with these people? Who knows – maybe they feel bad about their lives, maybe they think that their value lies in being thin and the fact that I don’t value being thin is a threat to their self-esteem. Maybe they have that “complete and total asshole” gene that the researchers are all talking about.
What is important is that bullying has a crushing cost and it is fueled by the pain and shame of the bullied. If we stop giving the bullies our lunch money their funding source goes away. If we stop giving them our power, then they don’t have any of their own. Of course it’s easier said than done – there are a lot of people who aren’t in a place to be able to stand up to their bullies, many people who even think that they deserve to be bullied.
But what about those of us who can stand up to the bullies? What if we could help? Provide an example, an inspiration, a little light in the dark? Near the end of the video Ms. Livingston says “we are better than our bullies.” That idea inspired me – not that we are intrinsically better but that we can take a higher road, behave better than our bullies and be an example for people who are struggling with bullying.
So I decided to start a “Better Than the Bullies” site. It will be a website of videos showing people standing up to their bullies – telling the bullies, in their own way and words, that the bullies have no power over them. I started collecting videos today, the page will go up in the next couple of days. You can join in if you want:
1. Create a video of your own and post it to YouTube, then send an e-mail with the link to ragen at danceswithfat dot org
2. Pass the word along about the project on Facebook/Twitter etc.
3. Send me your ideas and suggestion to make the project better ragen at danceswithfat dot org
Here is the original video:
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